Monday, August 22, 2011

the apron strings a little shorter

it happened.
i sent my 1st child to kindergarten today.
he was delighted.
up at 6:45,
but unable to get out of my bed.
fully dressed, teeth brushed, hair combed, & bed all made all by himself by 8:00.
he ran all the way to school.
he was excited.
i have hope in my heart that he will always be this excited for school!
(don't worry, i can be realistic.)
his favorite parts of the day were...
(he played with harrison and learned how to climb through monkey bars to get to the top from a 2nd grader.)
having his aunt aubrey cross him across the street,
and chinese.
he is fascinated with his chinese teacher.
there was no fear or anxiety in this child;
that made it easier for me.
i am excited for him and for these new adventures.
however, all morning i couldn't stop feeling like something was missing,
a part of something that i have always known as a mother.
this feeling grew into a tender ache that hasn't quite gone away.
i ache that i only got 5 years with him all to myself before i had to turn him over to the world.
it just doesn't seem right in this tender mother's heart.
i'm still trying to process this system that has snatched up my firstborn.
thankfully there are adventures to be had and time to be spent with 2 other delightful children.
and i will always savor comments like this even more than ever:

i asked sam if he missed his brother and sister.
he said "not really. the only person i missed is you."

and that is a mutual feeling.


katwalk said...

He looks pretty happy. glad he likes it..but did Will and Maggie miss him?

Uriona Family said...

He is so cute. I have a feeling he is going to Dax's rock through all this "scary" stuff. I'm so glad they ended up together.

aubrey said...

What a great post...and yes you will become more realistic when he begins to groan at the mention of another school day. Luckily, you have a few years for the excitement to wear off.

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