Tuesday, February 28, 2012

choose the right

choose the right (and NOT in a church sense) has always been my parenting mantra.
it seemed so simple.
just pick the right parenting philosophy/style,
then do it the right way,
and your kids & your life would always be just right.
oh, boy!
after a day like today i'm wondering if i've done anything right in my mothering!
i'm not so sure that will be my parenting mantra anymore.
it just doesn't seem right.
i'm beginning to wonder if there really is a "right" way to parent.
there are so many ways to choose to do it.
to spank,
to time-out,
to blatant ignoring bad behavior,
to unschool,
to preschool,
to late start,
to free play,
to structured play,
to chore charts,
to simplify,
to overstimulate,
to play date,
to isolate,
to handmade,
to store bought,
to plug-in,
to stay un-plugged,
and on,
and on,
and on.
while i'm always trying to balance these types of things
and "figure" it out,
my kids are still spilling water, accidentally & purposefully, many times a day,
still fighting with each other,
still never wanting to play with a toy,
but still always needing cardboard boxes & just a few more nails,
still needing a snack,
and still needing me within a 3 foot radius at all times.
today has been a bit of a rough day.
(sam reminded me that he sometimes wakes up on the wrong side of the bed & can't snap out of it all day so he understands. bless that child!)
the rough day part is not really even the purpose of this post.
it's more a reminder,
a blatant one at that,
that my kids are just kids.
and certainly kids with their own strong personalities.
it would be the best gift for them & myself if i could remember that above any parenting strategy.
because then on days like this i won't get myself in such a tizzy.
it would be easier to remember that days like this just come sometimes.
that it's not my fault,
and that another parenting tactic wouldn't change the frustrations or exhaustion that comes on a day like this.
it would be easier to celebrate just how delightful my kids are,
especially because i know they aren't like this everyday.
then when i reach my limit,
i would be able to kick back easier,
turn on a show,
and toss them another dry beach towel to clean up the 19th water spill of the day.
that's what feels the most right.


Uriona Family said...

Oh boy, we should talk. You would feel much better about life. I had a parenting mantra, a stance all figured out...or so I thought. The whole thing went to pot this week in the principals office. :)

I didn't even know Dax had a playdate with Sam. I'm so glad, but I feel so out of it. It's hard to be away. Hopefully there were no "stunts" at your place.

Ganny said...

Hee Hee

Pete said...

Ahh baby, you are the greatest. As I here you sewing downstairs I can feel the frustration melting off you. I am glad you have an "out" like sewing that helps you unwind. Remember, "momma said there'd be days like this...." Even on "days like this..." you are just as graceful as ever. :)

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